PUT DOWN YOUR WEAPONS

So, doll, I am fascinated by the synchronicity in life. How, when there is something you are meant to get, or understand, the message will be given to you in a myriad of different ways. Lately it has been about letting go. Surrendering. Now I know that many people will see this as a weakness. Maybe it is part of the human psyche to automatically fight back. But there does come a time when letting go, putting down your weapons as it were, is the most powerful and empowering action you can take.  Right now we are living in a world that seems to be embattled wherever you look, sometimes with devastating consequences. From miners in Marikana to opposing political parties; from countries arguing over borders to divorced parents fighting over children and ownership of things. From road rage to Arab Springs, service delivery protests to e-toll court actions - the world literally seems to be at war. We get angry over the slightest thing. It doesn't take much to rattle our equilibrium or peacefulness. Hah! We are not quite as serene as we would have people believe! There is a wonderful saying - cease the war within and the war without will cease. All wars start with us, the individual. It isn't a country that starts a war, it's the people. If there is conflict in your heart, in your home, in your family, you can bet your life there is conflict around you. Now I absolutely agree that life is not about sticking one's head in the sand and pretending it's all "OK". Living in an "airy fairy" spiritual world where you choose to ignore all that is happening. Yes yes yes we know it's an illusion but we still have to live in this illusion and we wake up every day, feeling depressed, scared, afraid, alone. That's not an illusion and it is not an illusion to have a gun in your face or to be tied up in your own home and robbed. That's reality. However, we can choose how we respond. We can choose to allow the intruders to continue to have power over us or we can choose to pick ourselves up and move on. By saying this I am in no way minimising the trauma of such an experience. But I am reminded of Alison Hunter's story when she was attacked and left for dead. And someone else I met at Lifeline years ago who was attacked and raped in her home. Both of these amazingly brave women said in essence the same thing "They did this to my body. They did not do it to me, my spirit, my soul. I am not going to let them have continued power over me by living in fear or allowing them to dominate my mind." Both women did the work necessary to heal and then moved on with their lives. They did not perpetuate the hatred and the fear these experiences involved. I am in awe of such amazing strength of character. They put down their weapons and are the stronger for it.

How many battles are you fighting in your life right now? What would happen if you put down your weapons and surrendered? Could you choose peace instead of this? Could you see things differently? Could you set your ego aside (much of our fighting is ego-driven) Could there be another way to oppose injustice instead of using intolerance and hatred which then just creates more intolerance and hatred?

My own personal experience has been that when I allow time for silence - and it only needs to be 10-15 minutes a day - a lot of clarity comes through about certain situations in my life. It is like I am given the opportunity to step back and see a bigger picture. I am choosing more and more to see things differently. And new ways and new paths are being shown to me. Love it!

What we put out into the world we get right back, sometimes in spades! So if life has become a bit chaotic, frazzled, angry then perhaps it is time to seek some silent space and get back to your centre.
What I know is that the "old way" of doing things no longer works. The American public grows weary of the mud-slinging and the dragging up of as much dirt as possible on political candidates - they just want someone who can run the country properly! The media is being taken to task for invasion of privacy, corporations are being sued for abuse of the environment and are facing challenges to the "profit before people" mentality. We are all part of these changes! Yup, little old you and me. Isn't it funny how we forget about the power of the collective and how we allow ourselves to be bullied, abused, ignored and taken advantage of by the few.

What exciting times we live in! Not for the faint hearted I agree, but never forget that you always have a choice and you can choose to respond rather than react. For me it certainly makes for a more peaceful state of mind, no matter what's going on around me! Give it a try, what have you got to lose?
Blessings as always.
Di

CONNECTEDNESS

A new series started on TV recently called "Touch" starring Kiefer Sutherland as the father of an autistic child, Jake. Although it appeared to be a bit of an odd story at first, as the episodes unfold, it's  about the connectedness of all things. I am in love with this TV series. Jake sees the world, past, present and future, as numbers. He is obsessed with numbers and although they make no sense to anyone else, his father is beginning to realise that Jake is sending him on various "tasks" whether they be to reunite families, address wrongs done to others or save someone from harm. As you watch, the significance of various numbers becomes clear as they turn up again and again in an episode. Jake is talking to his father through the numbers that he becomes fixated on and it is up to his father to decipher them, as Jake never speaks, never has spoken.

What I love about this TV series is how it shows us that we are all, in some way, connected. That we should never under-estimate the impact of our actions on other people, no matter how small we think those actions may be. Woven into this story is a cell phone which goes around the world, people make videos on it and then drop it into some random stranger's bag or backpack. A singer becomes internationally known, a father traces lost photos of his deceased daughter and so it goes.

There are times when we feel so alone, so separate from everyone else. We feel that the world is against us. That there is no-one who understands. Yet that could not be further from the truth.

You just have to watch the news, those situations where some natural disaster has occurred, destroying homes and lives; where wars are being fought and people threatened. The Internet is filled with images of soliders carrying the injured children of those who are their enemies; of people risking lives to save an animal; of people coming to the assistance of those in danger or in need.

It is at those times that our need to reach out and help, to show compassion and love, suddenly leaps to the fore. That inner light of divinity suddenly burns brightly and we set aside our thoughts of judgement and racism and hatred and for a brief moment, we become One. This is the time when we practice random acts of kindness without a thought of our own gain.

In the moments of deepest need and struggle and pain we are able to put aside our differences and for a brief time become united in a common goal. In these times the ego has no place, all pretences are dropped and we move and act as one, often without even thinking.

In a time when almost every country in the world is shouting about "economic recession" over a million pounds is raised in the name of a woman who died running a Marathon in London. It is when you are able to touch people at this deep level that they connect with their own Oneness and they give. Even if it is for a short while only, that connection is experienced and honoured.

In spite of the apparent craziness of the world we live in, under the surface there is a more powerful, more stable thread that connects us all, Jake understands this, as I believe all autistic children do - and yet we label them damaged! This TV series is teaching us a great deal about the not-so-random-moments of life. It is for us to recognise them and to be in awe of the synchronicity of the world in which we live. There is Divine order and we are part of that order.

I think it is a bit sad that the only time we often experience this oneness is when there is need in orders. Isn't it time we started acknowledging our connectedness and living it? What impact are you having on the world around you?

Blessings to you as always.
Di

MY LIFE WITH ROBIN SHARMA

Well doll, strange to think that this time last week (15th July) it was all over and my life with Robin Sharma had come to an end. For the previous six weeks the Monk Who Sold His Ferrari had occupied most of my waking hours. I would regularly pinch myself when I looked at his books on my bookshelf, not quite believing that on the 15th July I would be introducing him on stage for his Lead Without A Title Seminar, as a fundraiser for Hospice White River. Yup I had managed to get this quiet, unassuming man with huge Presence to come to the Lowveld. There was no amazing story attached to this, no unusual co-incidences or strange happenings. I just asked. And he came. Seriously. Well ok, there were some things that had to happen first, like paying him and signing a contract but we were committed and on the 15th July at around 9.15am I heard myself say "Ladies & Gentlemen - please welcome Robin Sharma". As people stood and applauded, I walked off stage. And promptly burst into tears (having "a moment" as my niece calls it). You know, I have been  great reader of self-help books for years. John De Martini, John Kehoe, Caroline Myss, Wayne Dyer, Robin Sharma, their titles fill my shelves. Always the quest for more self-understanding, to make a difference, to inspire others. Yet organizing this fundraiser for Hospice, bringing Robin Sharma here, has helped me to overcome some major personal hurdles. I mean, doll, if I can do this, what can I not do??? What else is possible?? As the enormity of the risk that I had taken sunk in, the fears bubbled to the surface in an incessant stream of negative-speak. What if no-one came? What if this was the biggest flop ever? What If What If What If......I was really forced to "walk the talk" and put into practice all the things my self-help books had told me. "Think from the end", "Stay in the present moment", "Allow the fears, don't surpress them. They will lose their power if you allow them to surface and acknowledge them". Surprisingly enough, it worked! Despite things like our local radio station being taken off air due to financial woes and not airing the interview about the event two days before it happened; despite other small challenges, I had a deep sense of calm and a knowing that this was much bigger than just a fundraiser and that it would all be OK (yes even the deficit, as we did not break even on the costs). Robin came, he spoke and he touched people in profound and deep ways. He brought a whole new energy to our part of the world. There was nothing special about the message - it is a message that every self-help book shares - but it is the energy of the man and the way he comes across, the way he speaks and writes, that is so powerful and reaches such a wide audience. This whole experience has been life changing in ways I don't even know yet. I realised a dream and in that I realised that dreams DO come true - IF you are prepared to take the action, do the work, face the fears and push your limits so far out that there is no going back. I did it. It is a day that will stay with me for ever. It is a day wherein through the greatness of another, I was able to embrace my own greatness. If I can do it doll, believe me so can you. So go on, be brave and step off that cliff. You will fly!! And if you don't believe me, here is the proof! The wonderful Hospice staff and volunteers with Robin and his business manager Jason.

Blessings to you.

TISSUES & TEARS

At our monthly gathering this week, one of our usually most cheerful and gregarious members was very quiet. When I looked across at her, she seemed far away, unfocussed, almost preoccupied with her own thoughts. As everyone chatted and caught up with news before we settled down, instead of being part of it all she was strangely aloof. I found it odd, and I kept glancing across at her. As the meeting progressed, with the usual sharing and lively discussion, the tears began to flow. Her face crumpled and with a strangled cry she lept out of her seat, by this stage sobbing uncontrollably, heading for the front door. Fortunately one or two others were just as fast and reached her before she got there. Holding the sobbing woman, talking softly to her, they were able to calm her down enough to lead her unresistingly back to her seat. The concern for her was palpable in the room. Tissues were found and she was settled back in. Slowly, haltingly, she began to speak. Without going into too much detail here, out of respect for her privacy, she was facing a terrible choice in her life, decisions had to be made that were breaking her heart. This strong, capable woman, whom so many in the community turned to for help, whose open, generous nature meant she was always willing to lend a hand, was at a crossroads in her life. The decisions that needed to be made were going to be hurtful to others, but she knew at her very core they had to be made. And somehow she never expected it to be as challenging as this. Or to hurt as much.

I think the fact that she had recently celebrated a milestone birthday played a big part in this. Somehow the "decade" birthdays - the 40s, 50s, 60s etc, bring about huge changes in a person. I know when I turned 50 a couple of years ago it changed me, I stopped worrying so much about what other people thought, I became more interested in living my life while I still HAD a life, of experiencing as much as I could, I started focussing on pleasing myself and actively seeking out what brought me joy, as opposed to doing what pleased others or what they thought I should be doing.

At that meeting I saw the true power of women's friendships and the incredible compassion that we have. It is just so instinctive, part of our nature. The love that reached out to her from all corners of the room, allowing her the space to speak without judgement or condemnation. I also sensed an unspoken fear - what if I was to face the same awful choices? Please God I never wake up one day and have to make that kind of decision. There but for the Grace of God go I.

I am so glad that she was brought back into the welcoming embrace of the circle instead of driving off into the darkness alone. Why is it that we always try and hide our tears? As if it is a weakness, something to be ashamed of? "I'm F-I-N-E" women say through gritted teeth as they juggle jobs, families and the hundreds of other tasks that make up our lives. Actually we are not always fine and sometimes we need to just let go and acknowledge that and allow ourselves to be loved and nurtured by others. Sometimes it is OK to say "I am not coping, I need help". To acknowledge that we are human after all! Maybe all that is needed is a neutral ear, a glass of wine, chocolates or a big box of tissues!  Or all of the above! We don't always have to "fix" things. Nothing irritates me more than when my dearest hubby wants to "fix" my problem. Most of the time I more or less know what I want to do, I just need someone to listen.

We ended the meeting with an "onion hug" - we all surrounded our friend, layer upon layer of love and compassion, and we hugged. Sometimes no words are needed. Sometimes we forget the power of a hug, or a touch.

I like to think that our friend left feeling calmer, more focussed. Tears are healing (even though they do ruin makeup and tend to make your face go unattractively blotchy!). The choices she faces have not gone away, there is no going around, under or over. Going through is the only option. But as they say, we are all angels with one wing and we can only fly while supporting each other. We cannot take away the pain, but we helped our friend to fly a little bit higher and a little easier. I know most of us felt a deeper sense of closeness and connection at the end of that evening, a greater sense of gratitude at what we are part of - that we really are all One. Sometimes we forget that we are all going through the same "stuff" and remembering that makes it a little easier to bear.

Blessings to you.
x

BACK TO REALITY

A friend of mine who has just returned from a long weekend away with her two daughters wrote "Back To Reality" on her BBM status. That phrase set me thinking. Are good times, happy times, holiday times not "reality"? Is our reality boring, trivial, uninteresting. Are our holiday/down times some alternate reality that we can only access now and again? We are not meant to be happy in our "real" reality? If we go with the thought that what we think about we bring about, then even just by differentiating between the holiday reality and the one we supposedly live most of the time, we are creating joyful, happy experiences that only happen now and again.This was quite a powerful notion and I am still ppondering on it. Perhaps our greatest challenge lies in accepting it all as "reality" and then embracing that reality in this moment. We can still be peaceful and happy, even in the midst of challenge and trying times. - Yes, we can! :) We choose the way we experience this moment. We can embrace and be grateful for the good health we may be enjoying, or the time at home, food on the table, good friends, the love of another, a warm bed. And we can equally embrace the magical moments of going away on holiday. The "3 more sleeps", of waking up on the morning of departure, excited and pleased that for a few days we break away from the usual routines of our lives. I have just spent 3 days in Kruger Park and it was blissful, soaking up the peace and beauty of nature, no emails to worry about, no cell phone signal for most of the time. Yet by the end of the 3 days I was looking forward to getting home, because I love my home and my animals. I love the reality of my life (ok, taxis and road hogs do try my patience!) Reality should be wherever we are now and all of our life is our reality. I guess it really does go back to being fully present in THIS moment, as opposed to yearning for things that have happened or things that have still to happen. In this way we can fully experience all that life has to offer and we can find the magic in the moment. As Ram Dass said, Be Here Now. This is the reality. There is nothing else. This is all we have. What are you doing with it? Powerful thought.

Stay Blessed.

TO HOARD OR NOT TO HOARD!

So doll, I am really trying to simplify my life! Doing a lot of cleaning out at home. It certainly is liberating throwing away "stuff". Remember when DVD players superceded the good old video recorders? Well, we have BOXES of videos. Programmes we recorded from TV. There they sat, cluttering up the bookcase, gathering dust. The video recorder itself gave up the ghost some years ago and ever since has sat quietly on the wall next to the stairs leading up to our bedroom. Why is it there you might ask. Good question.....dear hubby was going to "take it in to be looked at". Well, it has been waiting to be "taken in to be looked at" for probably the past 3 or 4 years. Well, finally, I snapped and I sent him a BBM message "Say farewell to your video recorder. This relationship is OVER! Finished. Klaar. Kaput. The End"....video recorder went out the door and all those video cassettes are now in boxes waiting to be dumped too. Hubby never said a word, I think he feared being booted out the door along with said video recorder. He knows not to get in my way when I am on a mission. (Small snag here though, not sure quite what to do with them. Do I become one of the inconsiderate, uncaring inhabitants of this earth that don't worry about the fact that I am cluttering up the already overloaded planet with yet more waste? That they will sit in some landfill where they will lie for a gazillion years leaching horrible plastic toxins into the soil?) We live in a throw away society - printers last a year if you are lucky and when they pack up your friendly computer guy says airily "Oh we don't bother to repair these, just throw it away and buy a new one, it's cheaper." I have a store room filled with old computer keyboards, mice, printers, cables.......amazing how we make things that are not meant to last, and yet we have not really created a system to get rid of (or recycle) the things we have to throw away. (If you have any suggestions would love to hear them!)

While in the clearing out mood, I noticed I had over 5500 emails in my Inbox. OK, it is our business and personal email address (my own personal email address has 2721 sitting in the Inbox as I write this....). So I resolved that every day I would try and delete a couple of hundred. When I started, I was completely fascinated by the emails I never deleted then. Emails that are only relevant for that time, I mean, a reading for the month of May in 2010 is hardly relevant in March 2012! I merrily hit the delete button time and time again until I became quite giddy, caught up in the joy of releasing a little bit of my computer space from the ties of the past. Of course I got techno-savvy at one point and opened the "Folders" so now I have all these Folders filled with newsletters, quotes etc that I have never had the time to read.... *sigh*.

Watching Downton Abby the other night, I longed for the days when we wrote with beautiful pens on beautiful crisp paper and then trotted off to the Post Office where the shiny red Post Box eagerly accepted our offering. And the excitement of the post arriving with a letter for you. My boyfriend who was in the army back in the 70's when I was a teenager, was stationed up on the Angolan border and returned home with a large bag filled with my letters, which were veritable novels.

Actually, I can blame it all on my Mum - she is a Hoarder Deluxe and her cupboards are a veritable treasure trove of empty ice cream containers, those little plastic balls that go in the washing machine with the liquid and other unknown funny looking plastic thingies.......Well you never know, says she, might come in useful one day.......

Ah yes, hoarding is clearly in my blood but I am slowly releasing myself from the genetic disposition to collect things which have no earthly or heavenly use. Now, back to that Inbox.........

Stay Blessed
Di

THE MESSAGES OF LIFE

Have you ever noticed how something you may be avoiding, or hate doing, in your life, is actually trying to tell you something? Let me explain doll....I train two or three times a week at a local gym with a wonderful personal trainer who is probably the only person on the planet who can actually motivate me to exercise. I am generally a couch potato of note, but as the years progress I do realise that if I want to keep in some sort of reasonable shape as I advance into my more mature years, I do need to make a bit of an effort. Ruhan has a way of making our sessions fun and interesting, always changing things and I actually find myself working just that little bit harder, pushing myself a little bit further - yes he is that good! In fact he even motivated me to do my first 5km race (walking) the other day!But there are some things Ruhan cannot get me to do. Using the stationary bike was one of them (give me the treadmill any day) and then there are the "step ups". You know when you have to step up and down onto a box. We use the benches at the gym and they are quite high. Now I have always had a problem with step-ups. There is just something about having all the weight on one leg, pushing up, that makes me feel insecure. I just don't trust that I am strong enough to be able to manage it. So anytime this exercise came up, I refused to do it and being senior in years to Ruhan, he doesn't generally argue with me and gives me something else to do. Then last week I had a session with my life coach (the amazing Mel, you remember). At one point during our chat she said to me "you know Di, if you want to succeed you need to step up to the bigger platform". And she made this upward movement with her hand as she said it. Suddenly it hit me - my refusing to do the "step up" exercises at the gym was a physical manifestation of my refusal to "step up" to the next level in terms of my personal growth! Because of fear. And lack of faith in myself and my abilities, not trusting myself......what a profound insight! The upshot of this is that Ruhan has now made me a box. Lower than the benches at gym and we are starting with baby steps. As my confidence grows so will the step ups. This week at gym I did my first "step up" exercises with Ruhan and Mel cheering me on! It was such a great feeling. Not only that, but I decided to get over myself and did my 10 minutes warm up on the bike and it wasn't so bad after all. It really is all in the mind. So - what in your life is trying to send you a message? What is it that you avoid doing/fear doing and how could that relate to something going on in your life? Would love to hear! 'Til next time doll, blessings as always. xx

TO DETOX OR NOT TO DETOX.......

To start the new year off with a detox, good idea, right? Yup that's what I thought too! So I signed up for a 7 day yogic cleanse, determined to do the right thing and go into 2012 having let go of the past, old issues and of course getting a whole new sparkly clean system as well! First day went OK. Stuck to my fruit & veg, hot water and lemon, went to the yoga class which is included in the cleanse, felt very virtuous. This was easy I thought. Day 2 I was felled like a tree struck down in the forest by a chain saw gang. Ran the gamut of nausea, vomiting, the runs. Oh and a headache from hell. Luckily it was a Sunday so I could retire to bed. Could not face food at all. Hubby just shook his head in disbelief at what I was putting myself through in the name of health. Day 3 dawned and didn't feel much better. This was not good as Monday is a working day - hubby looked at me with raised eyebrow as I lay pale and wan on the bed - clearly not much was going to get done in the office that day! Days 4 and 5 were supposed to be fasting days - uh - been there, done that on Days 2 & 3. Did I mention the self-enemas that were part of the program......?Was feeling so lousy never made yoga class on Days 3 & 4. I sat quietly early on the morning of Day 4, feeling more like myself and, shock, horror, having broken down the night before and taken two painkillers for the headache from hell (well it was either that or rip my head off my shoulders) and feeling blessed relief as it finally lifted. I looked out at the garden, sipping my hot lemon water and a little voice popped up in my head and said "what the hell are you doing to yourself???" Well doll to be honest I had kind of been wondering the same thing!! Clearly this cleanse was a lot harsher on my body than I had anticipated. In that moment, I knew I wasn't going back and when I made THAT decision I could feel my spirits lift and my body gave a huge sigh of relief. How often do we do that to ourselves? Put ourselves through something because someone else says it's "good" for us? Even when every fibre of our being is shrieking "DON'T!" A friend commiserated that I had wasted my money. Not at all! It was a powerful lesson in listening to and trusting my body. I also learnt that I can eat a lot less and I am also more aware of what I put into my mouth and am eating far more mindfully (have to admit, the first glass of wine after that was thoroughly savoured!) I know that my body is far happier with lightly cooked foods than loads and loads of raw fruit and veggies. I went into this cleanse too fast. Once I had adapted the food plan to my needs for the week my body was so much happier. We are all so individual and unique and our body is our greatest guide, not just in something like this, but in anything else we experience in life. If we just take the time to listen. Now I know - a detox like this is not for me. And at least I managed to avoid that enema!!!!!

2012 HERE WE GO!

2012 is upon us! Festive season seems to have whizzed past, as time tends to do these days. I try and read something inspirational daily, preferably early in the morning before my day starts. Don't always get that part right, but hey, I'm only human after all :) - Robin Sharma, Wayne Dyer, A Course in Miracles are some of the books I dip into. I find that reading something inspirational every day, even if it is just one quote, really helps to keep my spirits uplifted and myself motivated. I also have a journal where I make a note of random questions and thoughts that surface as I read. This morning, in Wayne Dyer's book "Change Your Thoughts-Change Your Life, Living the Wisdom of the Tao" he talks about "allowing" instead of "wanting". Now I already know that when you constantly "want" something (money, to be slim, success etc) you just get more of......wanting!!! This chapter of the book ties up perfectly with the New Year channelling I listened to on the 31st December, by Angela Deutschmann www.angeladeutschmann.com at the beautiful Boondocks Mountain Lodge & Labyrinth near Barberton, www.boondocks.co.za which was all about what we give ourselves permission for now shows up in our future! Serious!!!! So, if I give myself "permission" to not exercise, eat badly, procrastinate, fear success......you fill in the rest, guess what is going to show up in my future? You got it doll, more of the same!!!!! What a flipping eye-opening shocker that was. My good friend, (brilliant life coach Mel www.newleafcoaching.co.za and I just stared at each other as the pennies dropped simultaneously!

See there is this thing that happens when you "get it". We can know on an intellectual level all these truths. But until the body "gets it" these just stay in the mind. It is not just about changing the mindset, it is about changing the vibration of our body! There is literally an internal "click" and suddenly things start changing in our world. We can say affirmations until the cows come home, but until such time as the body "feels" them, they have little effect.

So, here's a question for you - what are you going to "allow" in your life? More money, better health, loving relationships? If you allow rather than want, surrendering to that allowing, then don't be surprised when the miracles start happening! Maybe take some time to think about what you are giving permission for in your life now.

You see doll, it really is that simple, we have the power within us to change our life. So stop waiting and start creating! Don't let the future gobble up all your attention (also from the channelling, love that). So often we come into a new year with major expectations of what it is going to bring, forgetting that we have to actually make a start ourselves. That we have to BE the change we want to see in the world. And the change starts right here, right now.

BTW if you are wondering about all the web addresses in my blog, I really want to share with others the amazing and inspirational people and places that have touched my life in magical ways. Paying it forward!

'Til next time, stay blessed. Be excited for all that is at your fingertips......
xx