FLOW

Being flat on my back with flu for 5 days, I have realized what a luxury it actually is to be able to do that. Go to bed for 5 days and the world continues to turn without me. I am blessed to have a husband who is not only an excellent nurse, but also a dab hand in the kitchen, so I am well looked after. Being bed bound is a good time for reflection and it got me thinking about how our circumstances often dictate that we simply cannot get sick. Single parents with no support system to look after or ferry around children. One man/woman businesses for whom every sick day means income lost. People who work for companies who suck the very soul out of them, expecting them to be at work no matter what. Profit over people and their well being.

I have been working on my own "Flow Experiment" (www.fairygodmotherinc.com for more info).  Living life in flow. Being sick for 5 days forces you to surrender to flow. You cannot control it or dictate to it. The other night, every time I surfaced, the same thought was running through my head. "Stay in the peace of your body" An ongoing mantra. It was just there  in my consciousness. So I did. Instead of focussing on the cough, the aches, the pains, the misery, I focused on peace at a deeper level in my body. Below the surface of the physical discomfort. Stillness. I had the sense that my body would deal with the healing process if I kept focused on the peace. And the healing process did start. I would love to tell you that it was miraculous and I woke up cured, but I didn't. I did have a great night's sleep. But somehow I had reached a point of flow and I let go. I could feel the inner shift. As a friend put it, that inner shift is when something "clicks" inside you.  That's when change happens.

That phrase has stuck with me ever since "stay in the peace of your body". So often we are at war with our bodies. We criticize them, we hate them, we moan about them. We forget that the body has its own levels of consciousness. We "fight" disease, we carry on a war with the only thing that carries us through life.

So now I'm wondering if this "stay in the peace of your body" can be used in other situations. When facing stress and the challenges of life. Instead of reacting with emotion, being angry etc, instead of sleepless nights replaying conversations and "what if" and "if only", we stay with the peace of our body. Perhaps thats what flow is. I'm certainly going to give it a try as soon as I get out of this bed!

Stay in the Flow!
Blessings
Di

ATTITUDE & GRATITUDE INSIGHTS

I think it is safe to say that many people are going through extremely challenging times. For me, it feels like a collective "dark night of the soul". All around me I am hearing tales of woe. Finances stretched to the limit, health problems, emotional issues, sadness, grief. It is taking every ounce of inner strength not to sink into the depths of despair and hopelessness. This seems to be reflected in society in general. Appalling crimes, a lack of compassion on many levels. Power plays, egos banging heads. You begin to wonder, is there any end to the cruelty, the inhumanity, the arrogance? But of course, we know that the media focusses on the bad news. There are a lot of good things happening too. Random acts of kindness, people being driven to make a difference, no longer able to just sit back and watch and do nothing. Anger is not always a bad thing though, anger can bring about powerful change too. We have a choice here. I was reminded of this choice just this morning. I have started to pull a daily angel card again. I find that sitting quietly, with lit candles, in silence, communing with my Creator, allowing my thoughts to soften, helps me to stay centered and focussed and more or less balanced! We have been facing some tough financial times and to add to this, just received notice from our tenants that they are moving out. Our first thought was - "this couldn't have come at a worse time!"

So there I sat this morning, breathing, allowing the myriad thoughts to finally quieten down. Finally it came time to pull my card and it was "Find the Blessings in Your Current Situation"! Well I just had to laugh out loud! Seriously? The card essentially said that worrying makes things worse (of course it does and it serves no purpose anyway), that I should pray, focus on positive affirmations and that healing comes with gratitude. As the saying goes, there is always something to be grateful for. Not only that, but there will always be someone worse off than you.

So hubby and I did just that. Sat down and wrote a list of the blessings we have found from these challenging past few months. We were amazed at how many there were. After finishing the task, we have a deeper respect and gratefulness of all that our life together is. From there we went on to list all the things that we want to achieve over the next year and then moved onto our “wish” list. All the things we want to do, see, buy before we die. Our “Bucket List”. The trick with this is not to start going into the “how”. That ends up limiting you. Just keep it to your list. And from doing all of that, we started thinking about what legacy we wanted to leave, and got the most stunning idea for the beautiful farm we live on. It is such a big vision we are not even sharing it with anyone at this stage!

We often pray, plead, beg for help from a higher Source. We forget that we already have all we need within us. We also forget that the change and the choices come from within. At times we forget to watch out for the many ways that the help or guidance comes. We wait for the bells and whistles and the grand entrances but often our inner/higher guidance comes from a much gentler, softer, quieter (sometimes more humorous!) place and we miss it.

There are some things I can do nothing about and I accept that and I now choose not to sit and stress about something that I cannot change or have no control over. I cannot manifest money from thin air (not quite reached that level haha) but I can change the way I manage our money. I can learn to become master of our finances and to make some serious decisions about doing things differently. What I can also do is focus on the many, many blessings I have in my life and I know deep in my heart that this too, shall pass and that it will all be OK in the end. I also know, that to make it OK is actually, at the end of the day, up to me.

Stay strong!
Blessings
Di

 

The Gift of Being

I recently returned from 10 days in Prince Albert, a small hamlet off the N1 in the Karoo. This was a "proper" holiday. Not visiting family (as much as I adore them, it's not always a relaxing experience as you try and see as much as possible of each other, it can get very rushed). No quick weekend break. 10 glorious days of sleeping late, reading and doing much of nothing besides drinking in glorious sunsets, moonrises, mountains and desert vistas. Oh and the occasional glass of red wine, good conversation and fine dining :)

In Prince Albert people don't lock their doors when they go out. You walk everywhere in wide, quiet, tree-lined streets. People greet you, smile at you. I realized how relaxed and free I felt. There was a sense of pride in the town and it's history. There is in fact a Historical Committee, fondly known as the Hysterical Committee due to the fact that they have hysterics any time somebody dares suggest making changes in the town.

I had time to think. No distraction from TV or newspapers. Didn't have much of an inclination to read either. In these quiet vistas your breathing slows. Your mind quietens. You want more to be than to do. Those wide open expanses seem to draw you back to yourself. Mountains definitely do it for  me. They speak to my soul. Massively impressive, silent sentinels, they certainly put life into perspective as you are dwarfed and awed by their presence.

I began to reflect on my life, where I was and where I was going. A small realization began to bubble to the surface. I  realized I was not always being true to myself. I had moved away from who I was to keep others happy. I was allowing others to influence decisions I had made. No wonder I wasn't "feeling" any of it!

At the core of my being lies a deep love of the metaphysical, the esoteric, yes the purple smoke. It's who I am and I make no apology for it.  I realized in those 10 days that I had moved far away from my core.  I had moved away from my Reiki practice and supporting people in their healing journeys.
I had forgotten how much I love empowering people on a heart-to-heart level.

I felt like that sojourn in the little town helped me reconnect with myself. Spirit works in amazing ways and my path crossed with an NLP practitioner who, with a Mini Transformation process helped me redefine who I am and what I want. I love how the Universe works!!

What I know is that my destiny seems to change. I don't know what lies ahead but I do know that I am where I am meant to be and maybe that's all I can ask for, right now.  Since returning home I have felt a deeper sense of connection. More in alignment with myself, if that makes any sense. And I cannot help but wonder if the flu has kept me bed bound for nearly 8 days is all part of the process. A clearing out, an integration of some sorts. Who knows?

In Prince Albert I was acutely aware of being present. No distracting "to do" lists, places to be, things to do. How often do we give ourselves the gift of being as opposed to doing?  I now realize not often enough.

It's something I am committed to changing.

Until Next Time
Blessings as always
    *****

PUT DOWN YOUR WEAPONS

So, doll, I am fascinated by the synchronicity in life. How, when there is something you are meant to get, or understand, the message will be given to you in a myriad of different ways. Lately it has been about letting go. Surrendering. Now I know that many people will see this as a weakness. Maybe it is part of the human psyche to automatically fight back. But there does come a time when letting go, putting down your weapons as it were, is the most powerful and empowering action you can take.  Right now we are living in a world that seems to be embattled wherever you look, sometimes with devastating consequences. From miners in Marikana to opposing political parties; from countries arguing over borders to divorced parents fighting over children and ownership of things. From road rage to Arab Springs, service delivery protests to e-toll court actions - the world literally seems to be at war. We get angry over the slightest thing. It doesn't take much to rattle our equilibrium or peacefulness. Hah! We are not quite as serene as we would have people believe! There is a wonderful saying - cease the war within and the war without will cease. All wars start with us, the individual. It isn't a country that starts a war, it's the people. If there is conflict in your heart, in your home, in your family, you can bet your life there is conflict around you. Now I absolutely agree that life is not about sticking one's head in the sand and pretending it's all "OK". Living in an "airy fairy" spiritual world where you choose to ignore all that is happening. Yes yes yes we know it's an illusion but we still have to live in this illusion and we wake up every day, feeling depressed, scared, afraid, alone. That's not an illusion and it is not an illusion to have a gun in your face or to be tied up in your own home and robbed. That's reality. However, we can choose how we respond. We can choose to allow the intruders to continue to have power over us or we can choose to pick ourselves up and move on. By saying this I am in no way minimising the trauma of such an experience. But I am reminded of Alison Hunter's story when she was attacked and left for dead. And someone else I met at Lifeline years ago who was attacked and raped in her home. Both of these amazingly brave women said in essence the same thing "They did this to my body. They did not do it to me, my spirit, my soul. I am not going to let them have continued power over me by living in fear or allowing them to dominate my mind." Both women did the work necessary to heal and then moved on with their lives. They did not perpetuate the hatred and the fear these experiences involved. I am in awe of such amazing strength of character. They put down their weapons and are the stronger for it.

How many battles are you fighting in your life right now? What would happen if you put down your weapons and surrendered? Could you choose peace instead of this? Could you see things differently? Could you set your ego aside (much of our fighting is ego-driven) Could there be another way to oppose injustice instead of using intolerance and hatred which then just creates more intolerance and hatred?

My own personal experience has been that when I allow time for silence - and it only needs to be 10-15 minutes a day - a lot of clarity comes through about certain situations in my life. It is like I am given the opportunity to step back and see a bigger picture. I am choosing more and more to see things differently. And new ways and new paths are being shown to me. Love it!

What we put out into the world we get right back, sometimes in spades! So if life has become a bit chaotic, frazzled, angry then perhaps it is time to seek some silent space and get back to your centre.
What I know is that the "old way" of doing things no longer works. The American public grows weary of the mud-slinging and the dragging up of as much dirt as possible on political candidates - they just want someone who can run the country properly! The media is being taken to task for invasion of privacy, corporations are being sued for abuse of the environment and are facing challenges to the "profit before people" mentality. We are all part of these changes! Yup, little old you and me. Isn't it funny how we forget about the power of the collective and how we allow ourselves to be bullied, abused, ignored and taken advantage of by the few.

What exciting times we live in! Not for the faint hearted I agree, but never forget that you always have a choice and you can choose to respond rather than react. For me it certainly makes for a more peaceful state of mind, no matter what's going on around me! Give it a try, what have you got to lose?
Blessings as always.
Di

CONNECTEDNESS

A new series started on TV recently called "Touch" starring Kiefer Sutherland as the father of an autistic child, Jake. Although it appeared to be a bit of an odd story at first, as the episodes unfold, it's  about the connectedness of all things. I am in love with this TV series. Jake sees the world, past, present and future, as numbers. He is obsessed with numbers and although they make no sense to anyone else, his father is beginning to realise that Jake is sending him on various "tasks" whether they be to reunite families, address wrongs done to others or save someone from harm. As you watch, the significance of various numbers becomes clear as they turn up again and again in an episode. Jake is talking to his father through the numbers that he becomes fixated on and it is up to his father to decipher them, as Jake never speaks, never has spoken.

What I love about this TV series is how it shows us that we are all, in some way, connected. That we should never under-estimate the impact of our actions on other people, no matter how small we think those actions may be. Woven into this story is a cell phone which goes around the world, people make videos on it and then drop it into some random stranger's bag or backpack. A singer becomes internationally known, a father traces lost photos of his deceased daughter and so it goes.

There are times when we feel so alone, so separate from everyone else. We feel that the world is against us. That there is no-one who understands. Yet that could not be further from the truth.

You just have to watch the news, those situations where some natural disaster has occurred, destroying homes and lives; where wars are being fought and people threatened. The Internet is filled with images of soliders carrying the injured children of those who are their enemies; of people risking lives to save an animal; of people coming to the assistance of those in danger or in need.

It is at those times that our need to reach out and help, to show compassion and love, suddenly leaps to the fore. That inner light of divinity suddenly burns brightly and we set aside our thoughts of judgement and racism and hatred and for a brief moment, we become One. This is the time when we practice random acts of kindness without a thought of our own gain.

In the moments of deepest need and struggle and pain we are able to put aside our differences and for a brief time become united in a common goal. In these times the ego has no place, all pretences are dropped and we move and act as one, often without even thinking.

In a time when almost every country in the world is shouting about "economic recession" over a million pounds is raised in the name of a woman who died running a Marathon in London. It is when you are able to touch people at this deep level that they connect with their own Oneness and they give. Even if it is for a short while only, that connection is experienced and honoured.

In spite of the apparent craziness of the world we live in, under the surface there is a more powerful, more stable thread that connects us all, Jake understands this, as I believe all autistic children do - and yet we label them damaged! This TV series is teaching us a great deal about the not-so-random-moments of life. It is for us to recognise them and to be in awe of the synchronicity of the world in which we live. There is Divine order and we are part of that order.

I think it is a bit sad that the only time we often experience this oneness is when there is need in orders. Isn't it time we started acknowledging our connectedness and living it? What impact are you having on the world around you?

Blessings to you as always.
Di

MY LIFE WITH ROBIN SHARMA

Well doll, strange to think that this time last week (15th July) it was all over and my life with Robin Sharma had come to an end. For the previous six weeks the Monk Who Sold His Ferrari had occupied most of my waking hours. I would regularly pinch myself when I looked at his books on my bookshelf, not quite believing that on the 15th July I would be introducing him on stage for his Lead Without A Title Seminar, as a fundraiser for Hospice White River. Yup I had managed to get this quiet, unassuming man with huge Presence to come to the Lowveld. There was no amazing story attached to this, no unusual co-incidences or strange happenings. I just asked. And he came. Seriously. Well ok, there were some things that had to happen first, like paying him and signing a contract but we were committed and on the 15th July at around 9.15am I heard myself say "Ladies & Gentlemen - please welcome Robin Sharma". As people stood and applauded, I walked off stage. And promptly burst into tears (having "a moment" as my niece calls it). You know, I have been  great reader of self-help books for years. John De Martini, John Kehoe, Caroline Myss, Wayne Dyer, Robin Sharma, their titles fill my shelves. Always the quest for more self-understanding, to make a difference, to inspire others. Yet organizing this fundraiser for Hospice, bringing Robin Sharma here, has helped me to overcome some major personal hurdles. I mean, doll, if I can do this, what can I not do??? What else is possible?? As the enormity of the risk that I had taken sunk in, the fears bubbled to the surface in an incessant stream of negative-speak. What if no-one came? What if this was the biggest flop ever? What If What If What If......I was really forced to "walk the talk" and put into practice all the things my self-help books had told me. "Think from the end", "Stay in the present moment", "Allow the fears, don't surpress them. They will lose their power if you allow them to surface and acknowledge them". Surprisingly enough, it worked! Despite things like our local radio station being taken off air due to financial woes and not airing the interview about the event two days before it happened; despite other small challenges, I had a deep sense of calm and a knowing that this was much bigger than just a fundraiser and that it would all be OK (yes even the deficit, as we did not break even on the costs). Robin came, he spoke and he touched people in profound and deep ways. He brought a whole new energy to our part of the world. There was nothing special about the message - it is a message that every self-help book shares - but it is the energy of the man and the way he comes across, the way he speaks and writes, that is so powerful and reaches such a wide audience. This whole experience has been life changing in ways I don't even know yet. I realised a dream and in that I realised that dreams DO come true - IF you are prepared to take the action, do the work, face the fears and push your limits so far out that there is no going back. I did it. It is a day that will stay with me for ever. It is a day wherein through the greatness of another, I was able to embrace my own greatness. If I can do it doll, believe me so can you. So go on, be brave and step off that cliff. You will fly!! And if you don't believe me, here is the proof! The wonderful Hospice staff and volunteers with Robin and his business manager Jason.

Blessings to you.

TISSUES & TEARS

At our monthly gathering this week, one of our usually most cheerful and gregarious members was very quiet. When I looked across at her, she seemed far away, unfocussed, almost preoccupied with her own thoughts. As everyone chatted and caught up with news before we settled down, instead of being part of it all she was strangely aloof. I found it odd, and I kept glancing across at her. As the meeting progressed, with the usual sharing and lively discussion, the tears began to flow. Her face crumpled and with a strangled cry she lept out of her seat, by this stage sobbing uncontrollably, heading for the front door. Fortunately one or two others were just as fast and reached her before she got there. Holding the sobbing woman, talking softly to her, they were able to calm her down enough to lead her unresistingly back to her seat. The concern for her was palpable in the room. Tissues were found and she was settled back in. Slowly, haltingly, she began to speak. Without going into too much detail here, out of respect for her privacy, she was facing a terrible choice in her life, decisions had to be made that were breaking her heart. This strong, capable woman, whom so many in the community turned to for help, whose open, generous nature meant she was always willing to lend a hand, was at a crossroads in her life. The decisions that needed to be made were going to be hurtful to others, but she knew at her very core they had to be made. And somehow she never expected it to be as challenging as this. Or to hurt as much.

I think the fact that she had recently celebrated a milestone birthday played a big part in this. Somehow the "decade" birthdays - the 40s, 50s, 60s etc, bring about huge changes in a person. I know when I turned 50 a couple of years ago it changed me, I stopped worrying so much about what other people thought, I became more interested in living my life while I still HAD a life, of experiencing as much as I could, I started focussing on pleasing myself and actively seeking out what brought me joy, as opposed to doing what pleased others or what they thought I should be doing.

At that meeting I saw the true power of women's friendships and the incredible compassion that we have. It is just so instinctive, part of our nature. The love that reached out to her from all corners of the room, allowing her the space to speak without judgement or condemnation. I also sensed an unspoken fear - what if I was to face the same awful choices? Please God I never wake up one day and have to make that kind of decision. There but for the Grace of God go I.

I am so glad that she was brought back into the welcoming embrace of the circle instead of driving off into the darkness alone. Why is it that we always try and hide our tears? As if it is a weakness, something to be ashamed of? "I'm F-I-N-E" women say through gritted teeth as they juggle jobs, families and the hundreds of other tasks that make up our lives. Actually we are not always fine and sometimes we need to just let go and acknowledge that and allow ourselves to be loved and nurtured by others. Sometimes it is OK to say "I am not coping, I need help". To acknowledge that we are human after all! Maybe all that is needed is a neutral ear, a glass of wine, chocolates or a big box of tissues!  Or all of the above! We don't always have to "fix" things. Nothing irritates me more than when my dearest hubby wants to "fix" my problem. Most of the time I more or less know what I want to do, I just need someone to listen.

We ended the meeting with an "onion hug" - we all surrounded our friend, layer upon layer of love and compassion, and we hugged. Sometimes no words are needed. Sometimes we forget the power of a hug, or a touch.

I like to think that our friend left feeling calmer, more focussed. Tears are healing (even though they do ruin makeup and tend to make your face go unattractively blotchy!). The choices she faces have not gone away, there is no going around, under or over. Going through is the only option. But as they say, we are all angels with one wing and we can only fly while supporting each other. We cannot take away the pain, but we helped our friend to fly a little bit higher and a little easier. I know most of us felt a deeper sense of closeness and connection at the end of that evening, a greater sense of gratitude at what we are part of - that we really are all One. Sometimes we forget that we are all going through the same "stuff" and remembering that makes it a little easier to bear.

Blessings to you.
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